Yo-yoing... and I dont like it!

<sheepish grin> Long time no see! Sorry... I've been away wayyyyyyyyyyyy too long! Tonight Im going to keep it short and sweet. I finally lost 20lbs... then gained four back... then lost 2 and lost another two then gained two back... Ive been yo-yoing and I dont like it. I could think of a million excuses as to why Im yo-yoing... but I think that would be a waste of time. Im just going to 'fess up... admit guilt... and hope that my sentence isnt a lifetime imprisonment in my current body.

I've got new incentive to push harder. We've ended our first Biggest Loser competition at work (by unanimous vote) and started a new one... with more competitors. And... a grand prize of $120. I think that should be incentive enough for me! OK OK... Maybe fitting into a size 12 will be a nice incentive too...

 So far according to my tracker... I've lost 17.8 lbs... since January... I'd like to add another 20 onto that by my birthday... but honestly... anything less than 240 would be nice though... well... off to do stuff! :D

Weigh In Weeks 4 and 5 Ups and Downs

First, apologies... I chickened out last week. I couldn't, or rather wouldn't write my blog because I was mad at myself and my lack of progress last week. It was a combination of unhealthy eating and lack of exercise. I only lost 1/2 of a pound. Part of me was frustrated to the point of apathy. I just didnt care. I felt like giving up. I didnt. I made sure to exercise when I got the motivation... or when I could force myself too. I felt good afterward.  I felt strong. I felt ready to take on the world... or at least the next day. I beat myself up mentally all week... which of course didnt help.

When I weighed myself in this morning, I was convinced that I was going to be on the plus side of the scale. I was shocked, albeit thrilled, when the scale showed me the beautiful... beautiful number! 249!!!! Not only had I FINALLY lost 20 lbs, but I was also below 250. (NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN!!!!!) I wanted to jump up and down and scream from the rooftops. I'm doing it! I'm doing it right!

Im so excited to be setting a positive example for not only my children, but my friends and family.

Hopefully I'll have big numbers next week as well.

Total lbs lost journey: 20
Total % lost journey: 7.4%

Total lbs lost competition: 9
Total % lost competition: 3.5%

Total lbs lost this week: 4

As the saying goes, the smaller the feet...

The bigger the weight loss!!!!!

So... I've been noticing this week that my shoes (which I actually got in a bigger size cause nothing else fit properly) are starting to get loose. I know it sounds odd... but that's how I know I have definitely lost weight... my feet are smaller! I know... sounds completely silly. 

It got me to thinking if the weight loss had any effect on other parts of my body. So... (skip this part if you are easily offended, are a visual person, have just eaten or get nauseous easily) I looked at my self in the mirror... naked... which as we all know fat chicks don't do. After I dont know how long, I think I found my waist. My little stomach pouch seems to be slowly disappearing. Its AWESOME! My hard work is paying off. 

I decided to step on the scale and see if there was any difference there. I am almost to my goal. The beautiful scale told me I was now 250 lbs. One more pound and I will have hit twenty pounds... 20.... two zero... I cant believe its that close. 

I feel really accomplished with my goal so close. All the sacrifice (boo hoo no mozzarella sticks) and hard work are finally showing. My endurance, agility and strength are all increasing. 

As well as my knowledge of how I function... I noticed this week (or maybe it was last week) when I made pasta for dinner that I was completely worthless after that. I was exhausted and drained. Well... I guess thats one thing off of my eat list. Another thing that I realized (for the gatrillionth time) is that my depression worsens in winter. I dont know if its lack of vitamin D or if its something else. I need to figure it out before it sabotages my progress.

Well... time to relax before hitting the hay!

Weigh In - Week 3 (And the strength of me!)

lbs lost this week: 2.4

lbs lost competition total: 4.4

% lost competition total: 1.7%

lbs lost journey total: 15.4

% lost journey total: 5.7%

So... I decided to switch it up a bit and do Tae Bo tonight... which I haven't done in months... maybe a year? I have forgotten how much I love it! The exercises make you feel strong. Billy Blanks always seems to know the moment I'm dying and ready to quit. It's at that precise moment that he pulls out some motivating pearls of wisdom and encourages me to push myself farther and harder. He not only pushes you to your limit, but shows you that its ok if you need to "walk it out". I need that... I need that push and that reassurance. I know that if I work hard... and strengthen my body, I can get through a one hour Billy Blanks session without having to "walk it out". And that motivates me. It motivates me to step up  my game, to push myself as hard as I can and most importantly... not to give up on myself. 

I know how intense a Tae Bo workout can be. Ive done them in the past. I didn't go into the workout tonight expecting to do the whole workout. I promised myself that I would do as much as I could... but I would try to make it to 30 minutes. It started off slow (as good workouts do) and built up. I had to walk it out a few times because quite frankly... I've abused my body (cigarettes, junk food and lack of exercise). I did most of the slower parts... but when they sped it up... I just couldn't seem to keep up. I walked it out or did a slower version of the exercise. I tried not to stop moving. I was pleasantly surprised to find that there were some familiar and old favorites mixed in to the exercise routine. I definitely tried to keep up. And I know that with hard work and patience, I will be able to keep up through the whole thing. 

Tonight's exercise reminded me that I am strong and capable. I can handle a lot more than I give myself credit for. I need to remember this. It is definitely an important lesson. 

On a weight loss note: I'm steadily losing weight at a consistent pace. I'm quite proud of myself. I didn't think I would be able to actually commit to this lifestyle change. So far so good for me! I'm 5lbs away from hitting 20 lbs. At the rate I'm going it will be another two weeks. Maybe if I keep up the Tae Bo I can make that leap in one week? Oh we will definitely see!

Goal for the week: Same as last week. Lose 5lbs this week. 

Tip: Don't exercise on an empty stomach. Your body needs fuel to properly work through a workout. Also, a small protein filled snack after a workout will boost metabolism for a few hours afterward. Also, make sure to stay hydrated! WATER WATER WATER

 

Mid week check in

WoW! Has it been a tough week so far! Mid week check in is saying I only lost .7 lbs. I guess I should be thankful after the last couple of days.

I worked my butt off Sunday and Monday... and boy did I pay for it! Sunday my upper thighs were sore... but bearable. Monday after working out I couldnt even sit... Id get halfway into a sitting position and then fall the rest of the way. IT WAS PAINFUL! I took Tuesday as a rest day... but Wednesday my legs were feeling the same. I decided to take the day off from work and talk to a medical professional. This wonderful RN said that my muscles need to get used to the exercise. The soreness is just my body telling me its building muscles. If it becomes painful, like a twisting pain... then I would need to ice it and elevate it. I decided to take Wednesday as a rest day too. IT WORKED! My legs are slightly sore today... but not nearly as bad as the past two days. I guess the elevation yesterday worked! I even decided to jump back on the exercise band wagon. And it's funny... I'm all sweaty and gross... I wanted to stop in the middle and take a breather ( I didnt!)... but by the end of the workout I was like... wait... that's it? Was that really half an hour already? I feel like I missed half a workout because my legs dont hurt nearly as much as they did on Sunday and Monday.

That makes me proud... to know that I'm progressing physically. (Even my Wii fit age is down 3-4 years!) Even though the weight loss has been minimal so far this week, the benefits I am reaping from this competition are reward enough. I'm getting stronger. The boys are seeing me exercise, which means I'm setting a good example for them. I'm developing a good healthy habit. I'd dare say its even becoming an addiction or obsession. Well... I'd rather be addicted to exercising once a day than smoking or drinking.

Hopefully I'll be able to make up for the two rest days I had this week and melt off the pounds with hard work. I guess we'll see on Sunday! :)

Week 2 Stats - And my self pep talk

% of weight loss this week: 0.8%
lbs lost this week: 2


% of weight loss since January 1st: 4.8%
lbs lost since January 1st: 13

Looks like all three of us had a not so stellar week. I was the only one of the three to actually lose weight. (Doesn't that mean I get immunity or something cool? LOL) We all had different reasons (and excuses... ahem pizza) of why we didn't do as well as we should have. 

Im using this "setback" as a push forward. I'm not going to let this stop me. I want to turn that 2 lbs into 20 lbs. My first goal of losing 20 lbs and being once again below 250 lbs is on the horizon. I can see it. I can smell it. I can almost taste it even. And let me tell you... when I reach 249... I will be jumping for joy. Because I did it. I pushed past my comfort zone. I worked out til I couldn't breath and my muscles burned. I ate salads when what I really wanted to eat was a greasy cheesy tray of Fratelli's pizza. I snacked on Edamame beans instead of M and M's. All because I have a goal in mind. 20 lbs is only the beginning... next it will be 40, then 60, then 80. I want to be able to chase my sons around the baseball field when we're practicing. I want to feel comfortable in my own skin when I go to the pool. Hell... I want to buy a bathing suit and actually WEAR it at a pool instead of just wondering... will I fit into it? 


But most importantly, I want to set an example for myself and my children. I want to show myself and them what a healthy lifestyle looks like, what a healthy person looks like. I dont want them to see that fat person who falls asleep right after work and doesnt have energy to play ball or go to the park. I want them to see the person who is full of life and energy. The person who decides... oh look... its 6pm. Let's dance for the heck of it! 


So many reasons to keep on keepin' on. All of them good. All of them different. And all of them will keep me motivated, focused and on target during different parts of my journey. 


Goal for the week: Lose 5 lbs at next weigh in. 


Tip: Trick your brain. Use a small salad (or sandwich) plate for meals. It will look like more because the plate is smaller. (Thanks for reminding me of this one Ms. Susan :) ! )

Weigh in - Week 2

This week was a tough week. It has shown me that I need to learn more. I don't know nearly enough as I should. My lack of knowledge has not prevented me from making significant changes to my diet and exercise regimen. I've drastically cut down on cheese (insert sad face here!!!). I've increased my water intake. I am trying to load my meals with veggies. I am definitely learning as I go along. One of the things I've learned (and I kind of knew all along) is how important it is to keep a food journal. I picked up a food journal this weekend (Biggest Loser... what else? LOL)  There are tons and tons of pages packed with important information, tips, recipes, etc. I've been reading a few pages before bed since I've picked it up. Tomorrow I will start using it. (Totally forgot to use it today... even though I was keeping an eye on my calorie intake.) 

I need to make it a habit to be my own Jillian Michaels or Bob Harper. I've got no one here to kick my ass except for me. I've got know one here to make me have an earth shattering life altering revelation... except for me. I've also got no one to blame, no one to take orders from and no one to police my actions... except for (you got it!) me. That's the hardest thing about this. I can tell my self what I am supposed to do... but I can also come up with a million excuses of why it can wait til tomorrow. 

So far I've been good. I've exercised 5 out of 7 days this week. (6 days if you count Just Dance). I've watched my calorie intake and ensured that I was eating mostly veggies (except for my slip up on Friday). All in all I'm making progress... And with that being said... my weight tonight is.....................................................................................

256. 

I'm slightly disappointed in myself. I wanted to put up a bigger number. But I'm also proud of myself too... Even though its only two pounds since last Sunday (the official start of the BL competition at work), it's a whopping thirteen pounds total since I began my personal journey. Whether it's two pounds or twelve pounds... I'm still losing weight. I'm making healthier choices and I'm exercising more. That right there already makes me a winner. 

I'll post official stats tomorrow. 

Goal for the week: Find 5 ways to add protein to my diet.